I have avoided writing this post for a while. In the past few months, I’ve had a lot of the same Instagram DMs popping up in my inbox usually with the phrase, “How did you lose so much weight?!”
It’s a question that, for some reason, always leaves me with some mixed feelings, even though I know it’s always a question with good intentions.
So it’s time I address all of it.
I need to kick this off with a few disclaimers first:
- Weight loss does not always indicate good health. Weight doesn’t always show the big picture.
- Every size is beautiful! Seriously!
- How you feel matters so much more than how you look.
- I am not a licensed health professional, so whatever you read in this blog post is simply my personal experience and opinions.
- This post is not a commentary on anyone else’s looks or health. Our bodies are all different and our comfort zones are all different. Every body deserves to be celebrated.
That third one for me has been the most important of all. I didn’t really have a big problem wearing a size 10/12 before. (This body of mine carried 2 kids! It’s awesome!) But I did have a problem with constantly feeling tired, foggy-brained, uncomfortable, and achy all over.
Every time I see photos of myself from a few years ago when I was at my heaviest, it reminds me of how depressed and uncomfortable I felt because of several underlying health issues.
I lost 52 pounds in 2 1/2 years, went down 4 dress sizes, and am now in maintenance mode. But the most noteworthy wins aren’t the ones you can see on a scale. It was not an overnight health and weight loss journey, and it certainly had its peaks and valleys (because that’s life).
How My Health Mindset Has Shifted
I always have to remind myself that this health journey is not over, and it never will be.
When I surpassed 200 pounds after my last pregnancy, I always envisioned a “finish line” for when I would reach my pre-baby weight goal. But conquering your health never truly has an end game (and that’s a good thing).
Each day with each small decision, I have to choose to take good care of myself.
I know I will still make poor health choices because challenges and times of stress happen. But what matters most is that I don’t let those moments of “slip up” define me or defeat me.
I will still allow myself to live life to the fullest and eat that slice of pizza if I crave it because it just isn’t realistic for me to survive on salads until the end of time.
There is no such thing as “good” or “bad” foods as long as I keep the mindset that all foods are good in moderation and with balance. It’s better to see foods for their nutrient/calorie density so that I can adjust the rest of my day’s food intake instead.
How I Gained Weight in the First Place
To me, it was important that I stepped back to evaluate how I gained 50+ pounds in the first place so that I could cut myself some slack and wouldn’t repeat the same patterns in the future.
Pregnancy and PostPartum Complications
It took a few years and quite a bit of diet and exercise, but I mostly lost all of my pregnancy weight after having my first born in 2012.
My second pregnancy in 2018 was another story filled with a lot of recovery complications, a postpartum procedure, birth trauma, postpartum depression, and a colicky baby who barely slept.
It’s no wonder I had such a hard time getting myself back on track physically when I was in such a terrible place mentally. If you’re a mama who just had a baby in recent years, give yourself some grace for goodness sake! It’s hard! You birthed and are raising a whole human!
Medication
Because of the postpartum depression, my doctor put me on Zoloft, which resulted in even more weight gain. I stopped cold turkey for that reason, which was a bad move.
Please talk to your doctor if a depression medication has negative side effects for you. I tried managing without medication for a couple years and wish I hadn’t tried so hard to cope without.
Last year, I started Wellbutrin, and it made a huge difference in my mental health without causing weight gain. It took a bit of a dosage adjustment, but it worked so much better for me than Zoloft.
Bad Habits
Working from home through a pandemic with kids in the mix while juggling my postpartum depression was no cake walk. I let food be my comfort, and I let every mood and activity trigger my food choices.
Being aware of my triggers has guided me during my health journey. (I’ll dive into what helped me become aware of them in a sec.)
What I Did to Lose Weight
This was definitely not a one-trick-pony lifestyle shift to get my health on track. So I’ll break down what I did over 2 1/2 years.
Everything I did I gradually added into my routine, so I’ve listed them in chronological order.
Food Sensitivity Test
I noticed my joints felt stiff after I ate wheat-heavy foods, and I noticed my stomach usually felt “off” after I ate dairy. I took an Everlywell food sensitivity test to check, and it confirmed my suspicions.
I didn’t have a full blown food allergy, just a sensitivity to gluten and dairy. I don’t know how accurate Everlywell tests are for others, but it seemed spot-on in my case.
I completely removed gluten and dairy from my diet for a year, and I discovered my joints, gut, headaches, energy, mental clarity, even my skin vastly improved.
I’ve since added gluten and dairy back into my diet, but I still eat way less than I did before. I do think removing it entirely for a time helped reset my system.
I probably should continue to keep it out of my diet, but you know what? It’s crazy hard to do. When I start to notice discomfort, I take a break. But I’ve done okay by just reducing dairy and gluten.
If you need to remove sensitive foods from your diet, visit Thrive Market to get food alternative ideas. Click “menu” > “diets” > select “gluten free” / “dairy free” / or any other sensitivity or allergy you have to see other food options.
You don’t have to order from Thrive Market necessarily. My local grocery store carries a lot of the same foods I pick up on my regular grocery trips.
My Favorite Dairy Alternative Foods
Whenever I craved dairy, I used these as alternatives to get my fix.
- Talenti Cold Brew Coffee Dairy-Free Sorbetto with Hershey’s chocolate syrup and salted pecans on top. (Seriously, it’s heaven and gives me my ice cream fix with no dairy.)
- Ben & Jerry’s Dairy Free Cherry Garcia
- So Delicious Coconut Milk Yogurt Alternative with toasted coconut flakes, sliced bananas, and walnuts. (My go-to breakfast many mornings.)
- Planet Oat oat milk and coffee creamer
- Miyokos butter and cheeses
- Primal Kitchen ranch dressing
- Over easy egg in place of melted cheese on burgers when ordering at restaurants
- My Ninja Creami has been great for making dairy alternative ice creams too.
My Favorite Gluten Alternative Foods
Whenever I craved gluten, I used these as alternatives to get my fix.
- Food for Life gluten free bread
- King Arthur gluten free brownie mix
- Gluten Free Double Stuff Oreos (they literally taste just like the regular gluten ones)
- Barilla gluten free pastas (my kids can’t even tell the difference)
- Tate’s Bake Shop cookies
- Simple Mills almond flour crackers
- Purely Elizabeth grain free granola
- Cauliflower crust pizza when ordering at restaurants (surprisingly, this option is getting easier to find at many pizzerias lately)
Prioritizing Mental and Spiritual Health
Adjusting my depression medication to a different type and dose was one of the best decisions I could have made. Depression never really made me “sad”, but it made me deeply unmotivated and emotionally numb. So medication gave me the boost I needed to then focus on my physical health.
Listening to faith-based podcasts like She Reads Truth and Risen Motherhood while I’m driving or getting ready each day has helped me immensely. Or taking a few minutes to do a daily devotion and quiet time over my morning coffee starts my day on an uplifting note. (See more about that in the Habit Stacking section later in this post.)
Small adjustments to my day to focus on my mental health has helped too. I highly recommend the Calm app where you can do breathing exercises and The Five Minute Journal for quick daily mental check-ins with yourself.
I always told myself I didn’t have time to do these things, but most only take 5-10 minutes! It’s absolutely do-able to sneak in mental and spiritual self-care time when you nestle them in with habits you’ve already established.
Self-Care Checklists & Habit Stacking
I discovered the power of habit stacking last year, and it has made a world of difference for prioritizing my health in my daily routine!
Habit stacking involves linking a new healthy habit with an old already established habit so that you’re more likely to make a permanent change.
Ever since I was diagnosed with ADHD at 14 years-old, I’ve improved my focus by making a daily time-blocked checklist at bedtime for the next day. (I used post-it notes on my nightstand in high school, but now I just use the notepad on my iPhone.) So I started sneaking in small health changes into tasks I already do daily in my routine.
I added a chunk of time in the morning for my self-care routine mixed with morning habits I already did. At the end of the day, I would add 1 self-care reward to do after the kids went to bed.
Setting it up that way helped me prioritize my health on top of my regular to-do list tasks. It totally works!
Healthy Habit Stacking Examples
- Drink an entire glass of water and take daily vitamins while I check my morning email.
- Weigh in on the bathroom scale as I brush my teeth.
- Do devotional time and box-breathing while I drink my morning coffee.
- Log my breakfast before I get up from the table.
- Stretch on the living room floor while I watch a TV show in the evenings.
All of these were such small changes, but adding them up little by little over time has made a huge difference in my overall health.
Supplements
I have very gradually added to and edited the daily supplements I take. So many out there I feel are superfluous, but I have noticed an improvement in my overall health by taking certain ones each day.
Here is a list of the supplements that are currently working well for me:
- Olly Women’s Multivitamin – I like the way these taste and that they already have folic acid and biotin in them for better hair health.
- MaryRuth Organics Gut Floral Health+ Enzymes – Whenever I forget to take these for a few days, my stomach feels it, which tells me this prebiotic/probiotic definitely works. Plus, my immune system seems to ward off illnesses better when I take these consistently.
- Equilibria CBD – I’ve taken these for years! I take one extra strength capsule each morning to help combat stress and promote a calm mood. It’s especially a must for me on a stressful travel day. Use code: BLESSERHOUSE for 20% off
- JS Health Magnesium – There have been multiple studies cited that magnesium can help with ADHD management. I’ve been really happy with my sleep quality and focus since starting this supplement earlier this year. It’s not magic. I have to take them consistently for a week or two to notice a difference, but it helps. Use code: SHAVER15 for 15% off or 30% off subscriptions
Noom App
I love the Noom app! Fair warning: It’s kind of pricey for an app. But honestly, I think having to pay for this is what helped me stick with it. If the app were free, I would have been more likely to abandon it.
But the feature I love most that makes it different from other weight loss apps is it educates you on the psychology of weight loss.
Each day, it requires you to log in to the app and complete 3 things:
- Weigh in
- Take a quiz / do a lesson
- Log your food and exercise
That’s it! I loved the lessons because it made me so aware of the ways I would sabotage my progress.
It has a built-in step counter to make tracking movement easier. Positive reinforcement is a driving force behind this app using games and rewards called NoomCoin to encourage you towards more progress.
You can join interest-based communities called Noom Circles led by coaches to talk to other Noom users and get more healthy lifestyle tips.
I appreciated that no food was labeled a “bad food”. Instead, each food is categorized by color based on nutritional value and caloric density. I was still allowed to eat anything I wanted but with balance in mind. Nothing is a gimmick or a fad diet in this program.
It provided strategies to help me overcome challenges like social situations and mood swings that would often be my downfall to my health progress in the past.
It helped me overcome the mental roadblock that even if I ate a chocolate chip cookie, I didn’t need to punish myself and give up by eating the entire box. It’s a cookie! Enjoy it! And then balance it with a handful of grapes.
Even though I have now hit my goal weight, I still find myself remembering those lessons. It’s so very applicable to make better health choices long term.
I lost 35 pounds over the course of a year using the Noom app. I took several breaks, got derailed, had some ups and downs, but I always came back to it. I’m sure I could have reached my goal much faster than I did, but I gave myself grace and I got there.
Even though I no longer am paying for a Noom app subscription, the lessons I’ve learned are sticking with me.
Semaglutide
That’s probably a dirty word to some of you out there, and it’s okay if this route isn’t for you. After losing 35 pounds on the Noom app, I hit a plateau. I just could not lose my last 15ish pounds to reach my goal, so I used Semaglutide injections to get me the rest of the way there.
The Noom app does have a GLP-1 medication program. After meeting with one of their doctors on a Zoom call, she suggested it would be cheaper and less of a hassle for me to visit a local med spa to get my medication rather than getting it through their program. So she refunded my Noom payment (which I really appreciated).
I visited a local med spa called Legacy Health and Wellness where they did my blood work first to make sure I was a good candidate.
If you are over a certain BMI, your health insurance might cover weight loss medication at your doctor’s office. But my self-employed insurance isn’t great. Plus, there was a chance it wouldn’t be approved by my insurance since I was just barely within the overweight BMI range at that point.
I am so totally not a fan of needles, but the injections didn’t hurt at all. I visited the office once a week to get my injection, but some doctors and programs will give you the option to do your own injections at home.
There are possible side effects, and it’s not meant for everyone, so please talk to your doctor and do your research about Semaglutide. I am not a health professional; this is just my experience.
How I Reacted to Semaglutide
The best part about Semaglutide is my food “noise” is gone. It quiets the “craving monster” whispering in my ear that makes me dream of hot fudge sundaes. I can still eat those sundaes, but the kicker is I can easily say no to it.
When I eat, I’m satisfied with smaller portions. I no longer feel the need to clean my plate.
You really need to prioritize protein intake and weight training while on the medication because it can make you lose muscle, if you’re not careful.
It isn’t magic, and it is still work. You do still have to watch what you eat and how much you eat. I did experience nausea a bit when my dose was increased or I ate very fatty foods or too much in a serving (Zofran helps). But I’m very glad I did it.
There is this societal misconception that taking semaglutide is “cheating”. But considering it has reduced my risk of diabetes, a disease that runs deeply in my family, I’ve shrugged off being judged for it.
I’m grateful for a better chance at avoiding diabetes that my diabetic family members didn’t have before.
Now that I have hit my goal, I am in maintenance mode. I have slowly been tapering off of doses.
Some people can quit the medication entirely and still maintain. People with insulin-resistance often have to stay on a once-per-month maintenance dose. We will see how my body reacts over time, but so far I’m still on track.
Meals
I used to be great at meal planning, but life gets busy and it’s just harder these days for some reason. Earlier this year, Robert and I started subscribing to Home Chef, and we have been SO happy with it.
It’s not “diet” food per se. We just found ourselves in the bad habit of getting takeout way too often.
We get the Oven Ready and Express options 3 times per week so we don’t have to be cooking for longer than 30 minutes each evening.
We buy double portions so that we have leftovers for lunches. (Our younger daughter still barely eats more than Tyson chicken nuggets, but it has taught our older daughter to be a lot more adventurous at the dinner table.)
It’s so nice that we no longer stress so much about grocery shopping. And our menu no longer gets “stuck in a rut”.
Exercise
My only regret is not exercising enough while on Semaglutide because I can tell I lost some muscle. I slacked off a lot over the summer especially.
Over the past couple of years, I mostly just used a cardio bike in our gym shed or walked while listening to my favorite music or a good podcast. But after focusing so much on my diet, I want to tone with some weight training as a next phase.
Before & Progress
I don’t want to call this “before and after” because is there ever really an “after” in life? I’m a living breathing human being who still has more of this health journey ahead. This isn’t the end. I won’t get it perfect every day, but I want to continue to make good choices as much as I can.
I can only hope I continue to serve this body better by not slipping into old habits. Each day is a small step, and even if I fail, I hope I remember to get back up to continue on the right path.
That girl on the left was always worthy and did not need to lose weight to have value. But I thank her for taking the leap to prioritize her mental/spiritual/physical well-being to improve every facet of her life.
My family will reap the rewards of a wife and mom who can be more involved as a healthier, happier version of herself. That’s the real win.
Frequently Asked Questions
Here are a few frequently asked questions that have popped up in my DMs to help you out if you want to know more.
The Noom app did set and track my calories, but now that I’ve logged my food for so long, I have a pretty good idea of how much I should be eating each day. My calorie intake during weight loss was usually in the 1300-1500 range (based on my age and BMI) assigned to me by Noom.
I happened to see a photo of myself that Robert took, and I didn’t even recognize it was me! It wasn’t just that I didn’t look like myself, I looked so unhappy and miserable. That was the catalyst I needed to make health changes not just physically, but in all areas of my life. I’d put myself last on the priority list for so long that it was starting to have a negative impact on my family, my marriage, and my work. That had to change.
For a year, after learning I had some food sensitivities, I removed dairy and gluten from my diet. But now I just eat less of it than I used to. I learned the power of food swaps in that time to satiate cravings with similar tasting, more nutrient dense alternatives. I still eat whatever I want, but it’s more about portion sizes, balance, and aiming for less processed foods now.
Nope. I naturally tend to eat a later breakfast around 10am, but I make up for it by having a snack in the evenings, so that doesn’t really count. I do prefer more frequent, small meals though.
The best victories of all have been the ones not reflected on the scale. I managed to climb the 300 stone steps up to Sacre Coeur without getting out of breath. I can dance in the living room with my girls now without feeling pain. Ultimately, those are the best wins.
That’s the stuff that reaches so far beyond any sort of vanity reason. That’s the good stuff.
No matter where you are in your health or your weight, I hope you remember that you are worthy and valuable and beautiful just as you are.
I hope you know that your worth is not defined by what size jeans you wear. Please don’t compare your life or your body to anyone else’s because we are all different. Be proud of that body in every size and at every stage. It deserves your love and your care.
